When life seems complicated and overwhelming, and you’re bumping into challenges with the people in your life, it’s helpful to remember that the only relationship is the one with yourself.

We think we have many relationships but in actuality the only thing we’re relating to is our idea of others… our experience of others is being filtered through our own beliefs about how they could or have, made our lives better or worse. And of course how they should be different.

We can simplify all of our relationships by simply being present to ourselves. Noticing what expectations we have, what resistance, what feelings show up, and that all of these have so much more to do with us than the other.

And everything that arises in relationship is sacred.

Our relationships help us to awaken to our true selves. The beauty we see in others is none other than our own undiscovered light. The difficult emotions brought to the surface by others are ancient energies wanting to be liberated.

Let go of your idea of what it is to be a good person or a spiritual person, and instead be a good friend to all of your feelings: judgement, hatred, anger, boredom, jealousy, confusion are all just wanting the space to dance themselves to freedom. Notice where these energies live in your body and embrace them with your Presence. That’s all they want and need.

There is great relief in realizing that we are only ever relating to the One self and that Presence is a choice that we simply make over and over again. We relate to this moment from our current level of awareness because it’s all we really know for sure.

When we catch ourselves wishing others were different we can realize that we are bumping into a part of ourselves that hasn’t yet been fully met and we give thanks for the opportunity to greet it and to deepen our relationship with our humanity.  We then have access to a fuller connection with ourselves and others, and more mature and helpful ways of relating in the world.

In the quietude of stillness in the midst of things as they are, we realize that there is no other, only the One, and that all of our relationships have been pointing us towards Oneness since the beginning of time.

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