When you’re feeling an emotion it’s actually a sign that life is going well. You’re here. You’re alive!
And really what’s most needed is to not abandon yourself. To recognize that you need your own love the most, and that you have the capacity for that.
Can you love this anger, this anxiety, this sadness, this grief, this fear?
And maybe you as a personality can’t love it, but can you sense that there’s something here that can. That’s beyond the analysis, beyond looking for solutions, beyond preferences, beyond the concept of good and bad. That has the capacity to make emotions feel welcome.
When you’re having challenging moments take care of yourself in little ways. Take a breath, sit quietly for a bit, grab a piece of fruit, have a glass of water, turn off your phone, move away from the computer, look out the window at a tree, go outside and breathe some fresh air, read a passage from an uplifting book…
Essentially what we need when we’re feeling difficult emotions is some space to relax a little bit so that any resistance that we have to the emotion is encouraged to soften.
It’s not the emotion that creates the discomfort, it’s the resistance to it. Physiologically, when an emotion is set off in the body, it moves through in 10 to 30 seconds. That’s the length of time in which the neurochemicals are flooding the body. If we continue to feel the emotion after that it’s really because the system is resisting.
But here’s the thing. Can you not make the resistance wrong either? Can you love yourself even when you resist? Can you allow the resistance to be as it is so that the hard edges can begin to soften?
Resisting resistance, or judging it, or saying it shouldn’t be here just makes those edges harder, embeds the emotion deeper.
What resistance needs is love, acceptance, kindness.
So notice what you’re feeling now, in this moment, any flavor of emotion that’s been hanging out in your system and just let it be here. Be curious, be open, be receptive. Don’t try to be curious, open and receptive but rather notice that there is something here, however faint, that already has that capacity.
As you breathe, can you breathe into the edges of the emotion, and breathe into the edges of the resistance? Brushing those edges gently like the back of the hand against a cheek, like a soft pat on the head.
And let go of demanding that you need to get this right, or demanding that the emotion disappear as you practice this.
Let go of any agenda or goal.
Commit to being present to this emotion, even though it lasts the rest of your life. It probably won’t, but if it does, assure it that you will be there for it.
Release the notion that you will ever be free of emotions. Emotions are what make us human and no matter how enlightened we are we will continue to feel them. We’re not look for a freedom from emotion we’re looking for a freedom to feel emotion.
The freedom to feel … that in and of itself is liberation.
And finally, don’t take your emotions so personally. Because we are vibratory organisms, meaning that we’re made of energy and we feel way beyond the edges of our body, often what our system is feeling, and quite possibly always, is not personal. We can be picking up energies from all around us, and there sure are a lot of energies on this planet right now.
Those of us who are becoming more conscious, cleaning up our bodies and minds, begin to feel things more acutely and that’s just the way of it.
It’s the price we pay for freedom, for clarity. And in our deepest heart we’re willing to feel. As we digest these emotional energies we clear them for the entire planet.
So don’t take your emotions personally, it just happens to be where your dial is turned to right now. Make space for them in your body.
And although emotions will continue to move through they will fade into the background and what will be most obvious, what will be your natural state will be this Presence that is beyond circumstances, stories, sensations and emotions.